I feel empty. Do you?
Do you ever allow the crazy busyness of your life to slow down enough to realize how incredibly empty you feel inside?
Some people run from this feeling – through alcohol, drugs, being a workaholic, etc.
Some people are overwhelmed by this feeling and they become depressed or worse.
What do you do with this feeling of emptiness? How do you manage it? Why is it there?
My feeling of emptiness feels like the Grand Canyon inside. Like I have this immense capacity that needs to be filled and most of the time, it isn’t. Can you relate?
And nothing satisfies this emptiness – have you noticed? You can stay busy and ignore it. You can try to fill it with work, money, entertainment, relationships, cars, houses, fashion, hobbies, children, etc. – but it never feels satisfied.
I have never found any natural substance that can fill this vacuum.
So I turned to the “supernatural” – that unseen realm we are told exists just outside our natural senses of awareness. People try meditating, yoga, special exercises to calm the mind and body. It certainly reduces your stress, but fill that void? Haven’t found one that does that yet.
How do YOU fill that void? Or do you do what everyone else does and just stay busy so you won’t feel the pain of emptiness? Denial only works for so long … eventually our awareness of that vacuum arises again.
I figured out why it’s there for – at least for me. And I figured out what to do with it. But knowing and doing are two different things.
For me, this gnawing emptiness is there to remind me that there’s more to this life than what meets the eye. That there is a realm beyond our natural possibilities that invites us to be more than we ever believed possible. And it draws me daily to chase after the only thing that I have found that satisfies.
I want more of what fills this place. I’ve got to have it to survive. So I pursue daily. Sometimes a little bit, sometimes a lot. I wake up at night with this longing for MORE. Almost like a drug addict, I can’t live without that connection, that intimacy with something greater than myself. That sense of Being that resonates throughout the universe. That Cause greater than ourselves.
We all feel it calling to us … we just don’t always respond or know how to. It calls us to our best selves. To be more than we ever dreamed possible. To care more that we are comfortable caring. To BE more than we have ever given ourselves permission to BE. It’s an unstoppable Force that is carrying along our entire universe yet it focuses on each one of us personally, drawing us in, calling to us in the night.
You know you’ve felt it. We all have. I call it “God” for lack of a better word. Though that word has been defined so many different ways that I hesitate to use it. But no other concept compares. This Big, Undefinable, Huge, Mysterious Force that calls us to Love and to BE things that seem totally beyond our ability. I call it “God”.
So, if you ever see me refer to “God” in my posts, you’ll know that’s what I am referring to. Not some religious concept on stained glass windows or chanted by a devotee of some system of rules. No, this is much, much bigger than anything I’ve ever encountered in manmade systems or structures.
I ask again: Do you ever allow the crazy busyness of your life to slow down enough to realize how incredibly empty you feel inside? What do YOU do with that feeling?
It’s driving me crazy right now … can’t get enough of what I need to be satisfied, to fill this Grand Canyon size hole in my soul. I must have MORE.